Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Confessions of a Momaholic....

So, due to changing circumstances and this blasted economy, I started working again yesterday. It is a very strange and surreal thing for me. I haven't worked 2 days in a row since the day I had Addie. Until the last 4 months, I had only left her here and there for a couple of hours with her daddy or family so I could show houses. Unfortunately, right now, the part time real esate just isn't enough for us. I needed something that was a steady paycheck.


So I put on some dress pants and heels and started to work again. I am only working part time, 4 days a week, so I don't feel completely overwhelmed at the moment. It has been a hard past week though as we've made these decisions. I kind of felt like I was giving into this stupid 2-income society or giving up on what was most important to me or something.....not sure what it is about being a mom, but the guilt of leaving my child even for a few hours a day has been a hard pill to swallow. It is really strange because I've never looked down on, or thought less of any woman I know who does the same thing. So what's my problem??? LOL, I honestly don't know.......


I know that Jed and I have always planned on and prepared for me to be home with our kids. I have always known and believed that my divine role is to be a mother. I know I am still a mother, and that Addie will be just fine with her daddy or family for a few hours a day. The real question here is, will I be okay with it??


I sure hope that I will be, because I know that this is what I need to do right now to help my family and I do feel good about it. I just miss the morning cuddle time with my baby girl, since she wakes not long before I leave. I am happy that 2 of the hours I'm gone, she's napping, so I am not "missing out" on anything. (Except my decompress/blogging/chill/cleaning/getting things done time) We can't have it all though right? So for now, I'll work for my baby and family and just enjoy every moment of this that I have!

Because the one thing I do know is that I LOVE ,LOVE, LOVE being a MOM!

16 comments:

Lori said...

Aw friend. I know this was a hard decision for you. I'm sending a huge huge hug your way.

McBride Family said...

you are such a good mom! i have felt your pain with the feelings associated with leaving children for work. my kids get daddy time once a week for me to go to the hotel and it's hard, but it's good too. where are you working?

Niki said...

Anyone reading that post could tell that you are a great mom. Just think how sad it would be if you looked forward to going to work. Remember that it's not forever and most likely she won't even remember you doing this. Good luck and we'll see you Thursday.

Melissa Rees said...

Where are you working? I'm so sorry but I'm sure Addie will appreciate in the future!

Ben and Melissa Ellis said...

I totally feel for you on this. Although I have not been able to stay at home full time with Logan since he was born I have really struggled with the balance between work and mom. Sometimes though we have to step up and help support our families. I know it is hard but I just look forward to the times I get to hang with Logan and that makes it all better. Where are you working at? You coming tomorrow to the party?

10zfam said...

what a sweet post-good luck with your new changes

Megan said...

You are a great mommy! Don't give yourself a guilt trip - lot's of mommy's have to do it, my sister being one of them and I don't know how she does it. Although there are some days I wish I were working and out of the house too ;)

C and C Young said...

You are an awesome Mom--look how friggin smart your kid is. It's hard to balance it all, but I know you will do it easily.

Jenny said...

Thanks for the love and support friends :)

Maria said...

That sucks! Hopefully you won't have to work for too long!

Janiel said...

I bet that was a tough choice. But you are a great mom now matter what :)

Jenny said...

I'm working for a lending office. I'm helping them run a few new systems as well as getting trained in loans and processing.

And YES I am coming to the sytycd party :)

Netti said...

I can't imagine how hard that would be to have to leave for work and miss your tiny kid all day long! But you are amazing for making that sacrifice for your little family and someday you will be able to spend all day everyday with her again.:)

Emmy said...

Gosh, Jen, you almost made me cry because I know EXACTLY how you feel. All of your thoughts about going back to work have been mine too. I've been trying to decide if the work I'm doing from home will cut it or if I need to just surrender and go get a job. Argh! Good luck to you. I hope it's not too rough on you and that it will just make your time with Addie that much more special. Love ya!

Amanda said...

What a hard decision. I can empathize as I've worked part-time since Max came on the scene. But sometimes we just gotta do what we gotta do eh? And just keep praying that things will work out soon!
But let's do play. We can totally do ice cream and comiserate about being a working mommy. :D

Andrea said...

Jen, you're such a good mommy!